According to new numbers published by consumer website, The Consumerist, 30% of employed adults single out co-workers or bosses as the worst gift-givers.
Then again they don't call it the silly season for nothing.
There is no word yet on who the unemployed rate as the worst gift-givers but I imagine Social Insecurity or the Federal Government would come into the picture.
Nor was there any referral to what enemies think of each other's 'presents'. You could probably have a lot of fun in the spirit of giving someone the shits.
Classic Example:
Government Advisor: Premier Kennelly, Barry O' Fahrenheit is on the line.
The Premier: Put him through. Thank You. Barry, how are you? Merry Christmas to you and your party. Are you dressing up as Santa this year?
Barry O' Fahrenheit: I am but I've just had a look at the list of whose been naughty and it looks like I can't give most members of State Labor a present this year.
The Premier: That's too bad. Are you going on any study tours during the parliamentary break?
Barry O'Fahrenheit: I was thinking of visiting your office to measure the curtains.
The Premier: Good. When you pop by, we can have a drink before all this silly election business begins. I'd like to give you a gift in a gesture of bi-partisan goodwill.
Barry O'Fahrenheit: Christine, that's very generous of you to forward me a copy of your concession speech. I'm glad you took the Prime Minister's advice and decided to start moving forward.
The Premier: No worries, BARRRRRRRRRRYYYY!!!Oh and thank you for sending me a copy of your latest policy document, 'Life after Labor. Re-building NSW'. I do enjoy reading a good Horror Fantasy.
Still have any faith left in your career peers to offer you a tangible demonstration of respect for you? If so, let these primary tales of pathetic eleventh hour planning demolish any particle of hope you may still be clinging onto.
'I got a card once with a note saying $20 was donated to UNICEF in my name. I thought that was a shitty gift. I would have donated to an animal shelter anyway' - Dwaine Scum
'I was just talking to my father about the worst gifts we've seen at work gift exchanges. Last week at the gift exchange his co-worker opened and envelope with a Starbucks gift card (they were supposed to bring 1 gift up to $10). There was no price on it so she asked out loud how much was on it and received the reply "About $10." Everyone looked puzzled until the gifter explained that his wife received it with $25 on it and had used it a few times and he had "gifted" what was left over.' - Dganderson
"Our despised boss was sad to announce to us that he would have to miss our holiday party because of a family obligation. During the party, we had a white elephant gift exchange and almost every present had something to do with the boss and how much we hated him. There was his face on a dart board, a "I hate my boss" coffee mug, etc. Halfway through the game, our boss walked in. His travel plans had changed." - Anoynymous
"The worst holiday party I ever attended was actually quite nice until upper management handed out little ornaments containing cash. The company in question did not give out any Christmas bonuses. One employee who had been with the company five years (making her one of the senior employees, given the company's high turnover) was so happy about seeing the hundred-dollar bills that she yelled out the cash amount, which inspired other employees to open their ornaments. Unfortunately, the vast majority of the employees found a $5 bill tucked inside their ornaments. Fueled by cocktails and wine, the mood immediately changed from festive to hostile. The general opinion was that a $5 Christmas bonus was more insulting than no bonus at all" - Patty
Personally I always enjoy giving my work colleagues the gift of my presence and a overnight lease of my friendship.
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